Thursday, April 09, 2009

The Scourge of Keplarism

I consider it to be a moral imperative that we take action to combat the habit of teaching, in our public schools, the doctrine that the sun, and not the earth, is the center of the solar system.

There can be little doubt that this view, known as the Heliocentric Theory of the Solar System, is a pernicious doctrine that is substantially responsible for much of the moral decay that we have seen in the world.

This theory was first proposed by Johannes Keplar. Since then, Keplarists have taken control of the scientific community, driving out all other competing theories. These days the scientific community is involved in its own crusade to demand that all scientists adhere (or, at least, publicly profess allegiance) to the Heliocentric theory.

Let any scientist dare mention that he believes in geocentrism, and you can well bet that the rest of the scientific community will rush to bully him into silence. A geocentrist would almost immediately be declared ineligible to hold any position of merit in the astronomical community, and a geocentrist would almost certainly be denied his right of free speech should he happen to try to teach geocentrism in the classroom.

Unfortunately, when we teach children that the earth is a mere speck of dust circling the sun, and not the center of the universe, they cannot help but draw the conclusion that neither they nor the rest of humanity has any special significance. Whereas if we teach them that the Earth is the center of the solar system – that, in fact, the whole universe revolves around the earth – this cannot help but full them with the sense that they in specific, and humanity on the whole, has a special place and a special significance.

We can see the problem by simply noting the historical fact that, throughout history, no regimes have killed as many people or done as much harm to their fellow human beings then those regimes that were lead by Keplarists. Napoleon, Hitler, Stalin, Mao Tse Tung, Pol Pot, every one of these leaders – responsible, between them, for hundreds of millions of deaths – were Keplarists. All of them held the view that since the Earth was not the center of the universe, and that their actions had no moral significance since they only concerned people living on a speck of dust circling an non-descript star in a mundane galaxy.

With the teaching of Keplarism in the public schools, it is little wonder that teenagers these days engage in so much reckless behavior. Without the sense that they and their classmates are, in some way, special, there is no need for them to care about their fellow students or even about themselves. Is it any wonder that we have seen such a rise in teen pregnancy, suicide, and school violence?

One way we can start to put an end to this moral decay in our schools, and in our society as a whole, is to put geocentrism back in the schools and to teach children that humans hold a place of special significance at the center of the universe.

I want to remind the reader that Keplarism is just a theory. It is known, even among scientists, as the heliocentric THEORY of the solar system. It is not a fact, and it should not be taught as if it were a fact.

Even if we cannot get Keplarism removed from the schools, we should at least fight to warn students that what they are being presented with is just a theory. We should be able to tell them that they should consider the evidence carefully. We should at least put warning stickers on all text books that teach Keplarism that tells the students that Keplarism is just a theory, that it is not a fact, and that they should consider alternative explanations.

I am certain that this is what the people want. I do not know of any polls that have been done on this issue. However, I would bet that if you ask people if they think that scientists, in presenting the heliocentric theory of the solar system to their students, should also teach alternatives to the heliocentric theory, their natural sense of fairness would move them to answer, "Yes." Geocentrism SHOULD be taught in the public schools along side heliocentrism in science classes.

It is only fair.

One of the great strengths of America is our right to freedom of speech and freedom of belief. Those rights dictate that teachers be allowed – even required – to teach alternatives to Keplarism in the science classroom. This is all we are asking for. We demand that the state respect our right to freedom of speech and freedom of belief by giving geocentrism equal time in the public schools alongside Keplarism.

It is time to quit discriminating against geocentrists in the public schools just because of their beliefs, and to teach not only the children but the school administrators themselves to respect the diverse views of the teaching community.

This is not only good science, it is a way of teaching children to grow up to become better citizens – fellow members of a community that is so important that it sits at the very center of the universe.

14 comments:

Mikoangelo said...

I lol'd. Hopefully the right people will take it for what it is.

Chris Hoover said...

Good science indeed.

One day I hope to create a museum which has evidence for alternatives to the Kelparist theory.

Alonzo Fyfe said...

Chris Hoover

One day I hope to create a museum which has evidence for alternatives to the Kelparist theory.

It would not be hard.

Just look at the sky. It's not the earth you see moving. It is the moon, sun, and stars.

yunshui said...

It's about time some bold sould stood up for what's right and just and true, and denounced the heinous lies of Keplarism! Well done for boldly taking the bull by the horns.

Don't be dissuaded by the Keplarist facists who'll try to discredit you! They'll be all over this post, with their "evidence" and their "logic", but you stand tall, Alonzo, and don't let them get you down. God bless you for having the courage to speak out with the TRUTH!

Anonymous said...

But what did the Sun spin around before 4004 BC?

AnnaZed said...

Wait, wasn't April 1sta fewdays ago?

Amadán said...

The Keplerist fallacy of "gravity" tries to turn the Biblical term 'weight'into "Mass", which means they're imposing heathen Roman Catholicism on our kids!

Which is not to deny that Microfalling happens. But Macrofalling has never been observed. If it really happened, the planets and stars would all hit the Earth.

faithlessgod said...

Lol! I submitted this to Digg and Reddit, vote it up!

faithlessgod said...

Woops the links digg
reddit

Anfractuous said...

And the firmament is flat as well. Otherwise, it wouldn’t be firm, now would it? I'll explain a common phenomenon to you. Your Keplarists say that seeing a ship come “over the horizon” proves that the world is round. Pure twaddle! Our eyes are split in half so that the upper part of the eye sees far away and the lower part sees up close. That's why we only see the top of a ship as it comes into view. As it comes closer, the lower half of the eye then recognizes the lower half of the ship. Even the Muslims understand this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7F5kYWceTsI

Just as my eyes prove that the earth is flat, they also show me the sun moves around us on the earth. Who are you going to trust? Your elitist scientists or your own good eyes? God would not make His perfect creation (mankind, in case you missed that part in the Bible) see that which is not true. Besides, if the earth were round, He would have told us so in His inerrant Holy Word. Daniel 4:10-11: The king “saw a tree of great height at the centre of the earth...reaching with its top to the sky and visible to the earth's farthest bounds.” If the earth were flat, a sufficiently tall tree would be visible to “the earth's farthest bounds,” but this is impossible on a spherical earth.
SO, KEPLAR = EPIC FAIL! SNAP! YOU GUYS JUST MAKE ME LOL!!!!!!!!!!!11111

Stan Miller said...

I loved the argument!
A few quibbles: It's spelled Kepler, not Keplar and I think it's Copernicus who first came uo with the theory and then with Keplar refining it and coming up with his three laws of planetary motion.

Luke said...

Superb!

Anfractuous said...

That's quibbley elitists for you! Quibble over details. Keplar/Kepler Copernicus/Schmopernicus. Even the word quibble is a silly word. Say it a few times and you'll see how silly you all are... quibble, quibble, quibble. LOL!!!!!111

Joshua McGee said...

I am a dyed-in-the-wool rationalist and atheist whom you will see posting more as I have just discovered this blog.

While I was deeply amused by the satire, I wonder how many readers know how we knew this before satellites and space missions -- for instance, why Copernicus was right to believe this.

Anyone?

The answer is "parallax", but if you've never heard that term, or heard it in this context, then what you have done is choose your authority. Religionists also choose their authorities. One had better be sure one has a leg to stand on in this argument.

That being said, I am sure the author knew the answer, even if he made an odd choice in using Kepler and an odder choice in spelling it. :^) And, deeply amusingly, I was reading this out loud to my father, who's a cleric. Two thirds of the way through he said, "Am I missing an analogy here or something?"